Oh dear, Preston just swallowed a dictionary and wrote a blog about Big Brother

Sometimes we feel a bit nostalgic for the days when famous people were distant, untouchable figures whose only creative outlet was deciding whether to dot their i's with a heart or a star when they signed autographs. But sometimes, particularly right about now, we're glad that they're now all tweeting and blogging away, and showing us how clever/stupid/funny/deluded they really are.

We might have known that Preston would have something to say about the death of Big Brother. But, boy, has he gone on about it. Writing in his personal blog, he uses expressions like "irresistible innovation" (yes, we learned about alliteration in Year 7, too), "irresistibly steep, derailed decline" (he likes the i word, doesn't he?) and describes his appearance on Celebrity Big Brother as that of "interactive spectator." Pretentious much? It's his opening line that's the most dramatic, and we bet he irresistibly, interactively and innovatively toiled over it for ages: "It wasn’t until Michael Jackson’s drugged corpse was found splayed on an incontinence mat in his four-poster bed that we remembered him as the innovator he once was." Ooh, the imagery. Aaargh, we've caught the "words beginning with i" bug from him now - MAKE IT STOP! To be fair, Preston does acknowledge later on in his "piece" that he's prone to pretentious waffle, so he might be a fool, but at least he's a self-aware fool. And quite a fit one, which is why we're being lenient.

So, well done Preston. You're the best writer in all of the sixth form and you should be very proud of yourself.

If you'd like to hear Preston spouting some more nonsense, this time through his mouth, then click here for Mirror.co.uk's big video interview.